2.Diary of Rules

Another source of frustration and irritation may be the (often unconscious) rules which dominate your life.

Write down during seven days (this may be at the same time you are doing Exercise 1) fifty rules that dominates your life.

How do you trace these rules?

There are two ways to observe this.

Option 1. Ask yourself the question:
Do I think or feel that all my life I am making the same mistakes over and over again? Or do I feel myself often guilty after making mistakes or failures?
If the answer is Yes, write down what you exactly are doing wrong. And if you feel guilty realize that you are feeling bad because of having made a mistake)

All these failures are caused by trespassing your rules. So it should not be very difficult to deduce from a failure one of the rules you are living by.

Option 2. Another great way of recognizing these rules is asking yourself what you ‘have to’ or ‘should’ do. Many people act according to these words. They most likely are playing a much bigger role in your life than you think. Lots of our actions are the result of expectations of others that we are fulfilling.

Write down all these rules and question yourself if you really want to go on living this way.
Examples of rules:
I am not allowed to be awkward.
I must look to it that everybody is feeling comfortable.

I always must be polite.

I must make a good impression.

I am not allowed to be lazy.

I should always do something useful.

I should always be saving.