Why are we suffering so much…

Dear friend,

When you join me on a cloud you will feel that the best thing that can happen to you is a complete absence of thinking. No thinking means having the courage to let it all go, trusting that everything is all right, drifting on a stream, floating. The feeling that will come over you is indescribable, incomprehensible. But that is okay. Because the moment you want to understand you’ll lose the feeling and you will land on earth again. Back into the labyrinth of your thoughts.

When you feel this sensation in your heart you know that is all there is. All the rest is an excuse for not entering our hearts. All attempts to try to understand life or our universe is calling us away from this only feeling that really matters.

When we are returning to the basics of it all there are just two things:

You and Circumstances. All our lives we are dealing with circumstances. Fortune and misfortune. Wealth and poverty. Joy and grief. Good and bad. The way we are dealing with these circumstances depends upon the feeling we have in our hearts. When this feeling is optimal good, circumstances do not matter at all.

The only thing that really matters is the feeling we have about ourselves. And the only way to achieve this is overcoming your negative feelings, which are basically negative feelings about yourselves.

So the answer to the question: ‘Why are we suffering so much?’ is because we are just not ready to overcome our negative feelings. That is all!!! And these negative feelings can be conquered!

It is up to you, to make a choice and get rid of your suffering. You are the only one who can make this decision. There is nobody nor any situation to blame for this.

You don’t need to suffer, when you don’t want it.

take care,

Rob.

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basics of acceptance (2)..you cannot be happy when you want it

Dear Friend,

from the moment we are trying to understand our feelings we are lost! In an instant a feeling leaves us. Immaterial matters should be felt, don’t try to understand them. You won’t succeed. Thinking and feeling do not work at the same time. Our thoughts are driving our feelings away.

Happiness cannot be understood, only felt. We cannot get hold of it. Just compare it with falling in love: you cannot  fall in love on somebody on your command. This special feeling comes out of the blue. Unpredictable. Afterward we try to understand this feeling and from the moment we think we can control it, the feeling disappears.

Of course we are trying to understand what happiness is. And as a start we are writing books about happiness and the ways to become happy.  This is a way to regain control. When we feel good we want to be able to recall this feeling the moment we want it. We have all sorts of tricks to try to possess it. We are giving good feelings names. We call it happiness, freedom, warmth, love.  Unfortunately we cannot evoke a good feeling. We have to wait and hope that it will return. We have to let it go, we have to accept that we are incapable of controlling these wonderful sensations.

What we can do is trying to get rid of our negative emotions (see nihonvision method). I think this is the best way to prepare yourself and make room for all good feelings. But at the end we still should accept that good feelings do not obey our wishes or commands.

You can conclude that happiness or freedom cannot be evoked as we are trying to do. A career does not make you happy, a relationship won’t work that way, neither traveling around the world, nor a religion.
It may give you a good feeling, but you will never understand why. You will construct an explanation, but this won’t be valid each time. Tomorrow you may feel bad when you think about your career or your relationship.

You have to let it go. You have to accept that good feelings come accidentally. It is not in our hands. We are only able to build images of happiness and glory and fame and freedom and love in our heads. That is all. And it does not help us at all. Feelings have their own rules.

take care,

Rob.

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basics of acceptance (1)

Dear Friend,

when we would summarize our lives we could say that it is one big fight with daily circumstances.
Most of the time circumstances do not match our expectations. We created images of happy relationships, prosperous careers, fortune and fame. We expected love and comfort. We planned to be happy, whatever that may be.

What we in fact do is preparing disappointments. As we know that we cannot control our lives, we still want to stick to that principle. We want to stick to our thoughts and imaginations. The world has to be as we want it to be!

Life would be totally different if we would let go and accept the circumstances as they are. But we cannot. We do not trust ourselves nor others. We do not trust that everything will turn out to be all right. When we would, we could easily let go our expectations in faith that whatever would come is good too! So we lack trust in the Good or God.

This is a crucial point. Trusting the Good or God means allowing something that cannot be understood. It is a feeling! Here our feeling meets our thought. And as we learned to trust our thoughts in favor of our feelings we cannot move on. We stay crippled fighters of circumstances.

So the first principle of acceptance is letting go your thoughts and trust the positive things you feel. 

That is why I introduced NihonVision, to be able to learn to overcome your negative emotions, so that you will be able to make room for positive feelings. Then you will learn too that the feeling you have about yourself does not have anything to do with the circumstances that surround you. They can only influence your feelings when you are negative about yourself.

You will learn that instead of filling your head with expectations and fighting circumstances you will start feeling what is here and now. You will start to love yourself and based upon this love, this ultimate positive feeling, you will look upon circumstances as matters outside you. They can only harm you when you allow this!! (and by expecting you are hurting yourself already before anything happened).

This means too that people cannot hurt your feelings anymore. As the things they do or say are a product of their own minds that do not have anything to do with you. As you are feeling good about yourself!

take care,

Rob.

 

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Love does not need a reason…

Dear friend,

I learned to stop searching for happiness, God, Love or something else. As from the moment you are looking for something you know (without knowing you cannot find it) you make a projection of it (see an earlier post) . You make a drawing and start living by it. You create a definition of happiness, God or love. This image starts controlling your thoughts and expectations. You suggest that you are in control, as you are the one who is searching and exploring.

The image of your future is not only a way of control, but at the same time it limits your vision. I was searching for Love. So I tried to fit my life in this new picture. Each time I encountered a possibility I looked at my picture and looked whether this would fit. I did not listen to my heart but to my mind. Feelings do not fit in any picture, they are unpredictable. The only solution to overcome this is trying to stop thinking. Which is very hard as we are trained to do so.

Do you recognize that thinking is is limiting our possibilities? I hope so.

So let us focus on Love. The moment we try to understand what Love really is, we are lost in thoughts. The way to recognize Love is the moment we act out of Love without any reason. When we are helping our neighbor without considering why we should help him. This could mean: spontaneously saving a child that is crossing the street preventing it to be hit by a car. It is a feeling that is driving us to act. There is no time for considerations. Something wonderful seems to push us to act! That is Love. It is impossible to understand, to find or to keep it. We can only hope that it will return to us. It cannot be controlled.

I am convinced that we can prepare ourselves for entering Love in our lives. We need to learn to handle our negative emotions. Because then we will become more positive about ourselves and others. That is the start, the opening, the invitation to Love in our lives! That is why I wrote an on line course and published it on nihonvision.com.

So please stop thinking about Love, instead act prepare yourself,

much Love,

Rob.

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stop running from the meaning of your life…

Dear Friend,

all of our life we are extremely busy, occupied seemingly in making our lives more happy, more comfortable. But in reality we are trying to avoid confrontation with the essence of our existence.  We are running away in our work or our responsibilities. We are running from the meaning of our own lives. That is why we have the toughest time when we stop working or stop being busy with our primary needs like food and housing.

Then we are asking ourselves threatening questions like: Is this all we are living for?

When our consciousness is growing the unrest increases too!

Only then more wealth, more money, more food, more seems useless.

Each crisis is a relief. It stops us from worrying about the real meaning of our life!
It gives us the opportunity to be busy with our fear of losing the wealth we have.

But the truth is we are not afraid of becoming poor, but facing our life.

We will never find happiness in the things we ‘possess’. I always ask people this question:

Why are you afraid of losing material matters? What is so wrong in being unsuccessful?
Let’s be honest: what does wealth bring us? Where is taking us more comfort?

It all ends up at the same question eventually: Is this all?

Material matters cannot fulfill this mysterious longing for the real meaning of our life called LOVE.

That is what it is all about: Learning To Love ourselves and love our companions.
Stop running harder and harder. Stop trying to do more in less time! Stop being terrified from yourself.
Embrace yourself, look at the fear that is driving us away from ourselves.

LOVING yourself and each other is the greatest achievement of mankind.
All the rest is a diversion.

But on the other hand do not worry, one day we all will embrace this love. Just look upon our so called success in life in getting more comfort and wealth as a detour. Finally we will reach our real destination. Then we will be able to say: Yes, we know now what our life is all about.

take care my friend, love is already in your heart

Rob.

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